It was a regular Friday. Actually it was not a Friday. It was a Thursday, only it was more of a Friday, because, the weekend was about to begin. This time, a day earlier.
And actually, it was not regular either. It was a once a month occurence. It was the Financial Quarter close day for the company. The company she worked for.
As part of their job, they happened to churn out almost a hundred 40 page reports every close. They churned them. And checked them. And re-churned them. And re-checked them. And then re-re-churned them. You know where I am going. So, sometime near the end of the day, they put up the final version of these 100 odd reports for all and sundry to refer to. And make big decisions, or point out issues, and the like.
She was churning their 8th or 9th version. Now the point is, in this world of automation, you have the luxury of making one report, adding some technology here and there, and then getting yourself 50 reports, which are very similar, but not the same, in one go. She was doing just that. Working on the one report, and trying to add the bits of technology She was aware of.
And then, he came online. As usual. And all was fine. There was a little bit of chatting, and updating, and general talk. It was fine. ‘I am tired of all the work , X’, she said, calling him by the nickname only she used. ‘I need a long vacation, come back soon, and we’ll plan one.’ After a while, the chat was done, and she was back to her original job of churning reports.
At the end of the extremely hectic 9 hour long day. She finally had it all done. All she needed to do was press that little ‘Go’ button on the file. And sit back. While it did it’s job of churning out 50 variants of the same report. To satisfy 50 different parties. So that’s what she did.
She went for a chat. And a coffee. Looked around, walked around. And returned. Ah! The reports were ready to go.
She glanced through the little thing they called an error log. Some reds. Here and there. But majorly green. Cool. That was good news. A few reds were ok. The computer was afterall a computer. The team mate came along and had a look. ‘Cool’ , he said. ‘Such few reds? You’re good to go. Don’t bother about them.’ She was happy.
All set to put them up for the world look at, she was doing the last minute checks. And something made her want to open just one of the reports and see, why those tiny reds were showing. It couldn’t matter, but still. And it would waste a few more minutes. And she was tired. 
But she chose to go ahead and check ‘just one file’. She went to the highlighted page. Ah, the Income Statement. That’s important. What could go wrong there.
And there she saw.
In place of the Sales figure for the second most popular brand of the company
Something unintelligible. Something she had to move to the slide show mode to check out.
It said.
She rushed back and randomly opened 10 of the other 49 reports. And there it was. X. 
The sales value for the second most popular brand for all the countries the company had branches in was X. 
Oh. My. God.
And so she began her original process of churning reports for the day. Once more.
And that’show, the 9 hour long Thursday, became a 14 hour long one.


36 thoughts on “

  1. Anonymous

    Reminds me of when I put a tracking worm on a multithread server and the XML decoder threw up a “Bossy” after every mandelbrot set.

  2. Anonymous

    good tht she checked tht random report or else tht 9 hours of work would have in danger by now!
    u take care girl πŸ™‚

  3. Re: =))
    Wow! Though only part i got out of the techie terms you used was that your report had ‘Bossy’ repeated on it, sounds equally scary! :O

  4. The embarassment is what scares me! I would have died of shame :0! Whoa! Just imagine the biggies reading this in the report and tracking back as to which useless individual actually made them.

  5. He he, he better! When I told him about it, his first reaction was, ‘OMG, did anyone see that nickname?’
    Hmph! Apparently, he would be embarassed. As if!!

  6. Anonymous

    It would have been really killing..but the last minute check always helps!!! The extra mortifying hours saved you from a big embarrasment!! But no matter what..this would hve been a funny incident.
    I am new to your space and I must admit that m completely hooked to your blog. πŸ™‚

  7. Anonymous

    Well, good thing u decided to listen to whatever that prompted you to go ahead and click the pretty-pretty red dot.
    In hindsight, am really wondering wht wd ve happened had u not checked all tht. The 50-odd parties would be wondering for sure. πŸ˜‰
    Thik hai, hasna bandh. πŸ™‚
    Peace. Have a nice day.

  8. Re: Ouch!
    Yeah Yeah, haso haso!
    I think I had my eyes wide open and round, just like the shocked expressions animated characters have, for almost an hour after I found this out!

  9. Hehehe, I repeat, it sounds funny now that I spotted it. But if I hadn’t , it could have been the defintion of embarassing!
    Thanks a lot for the compliment! Keep coming!

  10. Anonymous

    Re: Ouch!
    *Laughs his butt off, but hastily quietens lest ma’am decides to throttle him*

  11. Re: Ouch!
    *Makes her eyes round once again* (Only this time it is a glare, and not a shocked expression)
    Anyway, I am letting you go free this time ;). I am in a good mood, tomorrow’s an unexpected off!

  12. Anonymous

    Amazing writing style
    Hey Divya. I have been reading your posts regularly and I must say you have an amazing writing style. I wish I could emulate the way you write that too with regularity so as to keep your blog alive. Well, I too embarked on this journey of blogging a few years ago but ran out of patience after posting a few entries (so called poetry and silly articles. Can give u the blog address if you care to read it). Your perseverence and creativity is commendable. Keep it up.

  13. Anonymous

    need help
    1. i want to blog. make that i want to write and post it. but in this melee of write ups i fear it will get lost!
    2. I am not even sure how to start.
    3. Am in my mid 50’s, have been avid chatter and now a bit tired of it.
    4. In other words i am lost and need advice on the above (Para 1 and 2 only, dont need help getting older, thank you)
    5. Spare some time to help me and email at raj_kat_2k at yahoo dot com?
    6. You do write well!
    7. No i am not a wierdo!

  14. Anonymous

    Re: Ouch!
    W-0-0-t! πŸ™‚ πŸ™‚
    Advance greetings on bloggy’s birth anniversary! πŸ™‚
    May words never run dry! πŸ™‚

    Heh heh heh, well, couldn’t get a better illustration to portray the love-shove. Tht was some what close to wht I wanted to portray – yin and yang. πŸ˜€
    Of course, it took some sheen off what I wrote. 😦 Next time I face such a prob, ll show-off me photoshop skills! πŸ˜‰
    Have a lovely weekend!

  15. Re: Amazing writing style
    Hello! Thanks a lot for all the encouragement and comments, a big reason to keep me going! πŸ™‚
    I don’t know if you realise , but reading blogs takes more time off my day than the actually writing a post, which I do just once in a while :), So please leave me your blog url, so that I can check it out soon!
    If I started thinking of what I write as silly, I would probably stop altogether :(, so I would suggest you don’t care either, and restart blogging! πŸ™‚

  16. Re: need help
    Hi there!
    I agree there are a crazy number of people writing on the net, and doing a good job of it. The only way to not let that stop you from writing is to start anyway!
    Open an account! Right now! And write about this confusion you have, to begin with ?:) Thanks for all the compliments! Would love to be of any help that I can, though I don’t know how useful I can be πŸ˜€
    Hahaha, I am sure you’re not a ‘weirdo’! Just start the account and let me know soon!

  17. Re: Ouch!
    Danke Danke!
    Ying Yang was the perfect illustration I think, it’s the squirrels/bears (?) that confused me, especially because the writing was so sophisticated! πŸ™‚
    Yep, photoshop would be good!
    And yes, may the words never run dry. Have a good sunday!

  18. Anonymous

    Amazing writing style
    Here are a few pieces that I wrote long time back(Check out Its very ameteurish and could be strewn with errors. Nevertheless, go through it and give your feedback so that I get a reality check whether to pursue writing or chuck it. I am sure you would have a hearty laugh after reading the trash. Look forward to your comments.

  19. Anonymous

    Re: Ouch!
    Oh yeah; I thot it would kinda portray two significant halves. It goofed – big time. But the other images Google came up with were a lot worse! 😦
    Happpppiiieeee budddaaayyyyy to DI’s Journal! πŸ™‚

  20. Anonymous

    Hello….where are you?
    Hey Divs,
    I keep visiting this space everyday, hoping to read next post of yours….but 😦
    Come back!!!

  21. Anonymous

    Where are you?
    Hey Divs,
    I keep visiting this space everyday, hoping to read next post of yours…but 😦
    Come Back!!

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