Weird Wednesday – title changed to suit post

Completely motivated by all the encouragement bestowed upon me in the last post (and due to an extreme lack of time for posting a fresh, er, post), I have decided to take you all for granted, and subject you to my first piece of fiction ever. Just a confession, I did tweak this version a bit before posting it. Oh come on, the original piece was by a very immature 26 year old me, as against the supremely grown up, 27 year old me! Anyway, bouquets and brickbats welcome, but do remember, you asked for it!

Till death do us part

‘Till death do us part’. 

She always found that phrase very romantic. The most romantic part of the wedding vows. She’d told him that. And he had laughed.’ That’s a big promise to make’ he’d said, grinning in this usual adorable way. But she’d said, however big, she would keep that promise. 

‘What’s your promise to me then?’ ‘I will always keep you happy’, he’d said. 

And she was happy, with him, with his promise, with their life. There was nothing more she could wish for. He was a good person. So very caring. Understanding. Romantic even.  

And they were similar in so many ways. Like he was not obvious with his affections. As in, he was dead against displaying his love for the world to see. ‘That’s when you know it is forced’, he’d say. He was always subtle. But she could feel it. Which made her feel even more special, and wanted. Their love was their own, and there was no need for anyone else to know it, or understand it, as long as they did. And she did. 

Of course, they had their arguments, and fights. But then who doesn’t? And it was never the same person who had to talk first. They almost took turns. It was perfect, in it’s own not-so-perfect way. And so, she was happy. Just as he had promised. 

But then, things changed. Not in the most obvious ways, but in ways only she could tell. Or see. It would be an unanswered phone call. Or a cancelled dinner plan. A longer than usual strand of hair on his shirt. The whiff of a woman’s perfume. She was disturbed, a bit, but she chose to ignore it. He would not do anything to make her unhappy. 

And then one day, he got her flowers. And this one act did what none of the other things could. She knew he hated these obvious displays of so-called affection. He had himself called them fake more than once. And here he was, tired after a long day at work, way beyond their dinner hour, standing outside the door, with a bouquet of roses instead of the usual scowl he had. In the regular world, it would have been sweet. In their world, it was just plain weird. It broke her heart. She knew things had gone wrong, way beyond her imagination. 

And that was about all the evidence she needed, not a bit of doubt in her mind anymore. She didn’t believe in conflicts and confrontations. She knew it would turn ugly. She didn’t think it was of any help either. She had always believed in the age old concept of letting go of what was no longer yours. And this seemed to be like the perfect set up for putting her belief in action. 

The night she decided that it was time; she knew exactly what she had to do. After a long dinner, followed by endless rounds of sparkling wine, she knew it wouldn’t hurt as much. And as he silently bled to his death on his side of the bed, she felt a twinge that he’d been unable to keep his promise to her.

But then, at least she had kept hers.

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Author: The Girl in Blue Jeans

Eh, seriously, what would you know from here that you wouldn't from the blog. Go back. Read!

79 thoughts on “Weird Wednesday – title changed to suit post”

        1. Hmmm, actually it’s making me think. But if I made her confirm, then the twist and the flow will get hampered no! Waaah! Tough choices :((
          Anyway, hehe, thanks, I am assuming you liked it 😀

    1. no change in rules…Blog Gods made them long ago and these are here to remain 🙂

      After all we’re not into some reading comprehension test,are we ? 😉

    2. Hmm DI I think the story is wow the way it is..what I wrote was just a reaction 🙂 so multiple readers will have multiple reaction…

      You stick to your plot 🙂 of course I liked it 🙂

      1. Hehe, no no, plot won’t change I guess, but frankly, my only worry (which was proved right) was that the fact that he was infact cheating won’t come across as obviously, and it didn’t! But then I guess, the plus is, it gave way for a sequel! If there is any that is 😀

    1. Ok, that;s why i was not too sure about putting it up, that is the dark-scary me! Muhahahahahaha! *looks to see if anyone’s still around*

      Anyway, now that I have done this, can go back and think of some sappy, mushy stories 😀

        1. Oh missed this one. Again? I am flattered 😀
          Well about your worry 1. No one becomes psychotic, they just are. 2. She was NOT psychotic!
          So stop thinking silly things 😛 Hmmm, I think I should do a happy-happy post!

    1. Yes he did, Yes he did, Yes he did.

      I know, not confirming makes her seem like some sort of a psycho, but the intention is very clear, he WAS cheating on her. My heroine is not psychotic. Period.

      1. Alright alright. The it bloody well served the psycho bastard of a husband absolutely right. You go.. errr.. Killer wife! 😀

        Please email me the original version now? Please please!?

        1. Oh ho. Itna kuch change nahi hai baba, only the part about the perfume, and hair and stuff. Thing is, even then he was bad ok, but it was NOT at all obvious, which made my poor (not so much) heroine look even worse! So I thought thoda explain karte hain. Hmmm. Will mail it anyway! 🙂

  1. Muahaha….you got me the cruel story!!!

    I like your herione.. (only in fiction :P, would not want to be anywhere around in real life 😛 :P)

    1. 😀 Hehe, considering you had already read it ( mean mean you :P) I thought kya jaata hai! So a tweak here and there,and I put it up. Oh I would not wan to be around her too, but like I said, heroine she is 😀

  2. Whoa! I like her 😛
    so what if she didn’t confirm things with him, that’s the character’s personality…

    Come up with a sequel DI, on the lines of – the husband was innocent, why he did what he did and what she did after getting to know 😀

    1. Hehe! Glad you do! Not many like her character 😀
      Aha, sequel sounds interesting 🙂 Already the brain is thinking evil thoughts!

    1. Hehehe! Ok done, red wine it is, the lights are dimmed, and whatever suits your fancy 😀 Considering you liked it, you design the sets! 😀 Thankie!

      1. Eh? What is this, you made my classy , cruel story a B-grade bolly flick! Hmph! Atleast angrezi me title do! But the phrase does sum up the storyline 😛

      1. Oye! No-no, no haseena ka inteqaam! No way! Mad people, for all you know she wasn’t haseen only! Hmph. I guess I will go with the other pupular belief of she being psychotic. Oh, and thanks! 😀 Very rare case this is, sad ending from me!

    1. I am not doing my scary laugh anymore, so you can make do with this grin 😀
      Anyway, don’t be scared Chinkurli 😦 That was not the idea! Ooh, but dreams are you getting? Did you watch inception?

  3. Awesome! (and not just because the guy died and i’m a sucker for sad endings)

    poor fella, to buy a bunch of roses and to get killed for that 😛

    For a moment I thought she was going to kill herself and say something sappy like “I kept my promise”, but you saved us there. Fella deserved it. Period.

    you really are a story teller, DI.

    1. Oh no, suicide is out of question in my stories! Revenge however, will find a place 😉
      Thanks Abi, for liking it, and I kept my promise and gave you a sad ending 😀
      3 stories I wrote pa, all last year, ippo I have zero ideas 😦 Poor me!

  4. OMG !!! She did it huh, as the heading suggested ???

    Loved the last line – he didnt keep his promise, while she kept hers !!!

    Written very well, for the immature 26 yr old !!! 🙂 Good one. 🙂

    1. Thankyou! 😀 Oh yes, she did keep her promise 😉
      Actually, the whole idea came from that one line, I wanted that to come out in the end, so I am thinking it worked! Thanks again!

    1. Hahaha! 😛 Yeah, yeah, make fun of me!
      Anyway, I know, a lot of people have said this, but frankly, like I said, I assumed that they had a connection where she did know somthing was wrong, and also, that she was right 🙂 But I guess it should have been more obvious!

  5. Loved the plot 😛
    It gave my fiction and overall die-hard romantic mind a tickle to jump into typing my next story 😛
    Keep these stories coming DI you are very good at scheming 🙂

    Cheers!!

    1. Thanks CB 😀
      Aha, that’s good! Will have more stories to read then 🙂
      I really hope to come up with something soon! First that, and then the courage to post it too!

  6. This is just too good yaar. Liked this one more than the prev one. Does that make me evil??? *gives an intense look with a lopsided grin*

    1. Totally! Welcome to the dark-evil women club 😀
      Thanks, glad you liked it! But frankly, this is SO not me, was a one off creation, trying to poke my inner evil ?;)

  7. A riveting read till the end. It was dark and I loved your intense, killer heroine 😀 But I feel sorry for the boy, he didn’t deserve to die 😦 Very well written DI. Now please, please, please come up with an equally interesting sequel with some cruel twist 😀

    1. Yay! 😀 Thank you Ajay!
      Ok, I repeat for the 100th time, he WAS cheating on her, aaaaaargh!
      But frankly, cruel stories are not my genre, or so I think 😉 Let’s see what I can concoct!

    1. Oh no! I love rotating templates, even if WP is mean to me and does not let me use all 😀
      The header I have a feeling is picked from the same place your Gravataar is! They have a good selection 😀

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