Day 7 – And I will try, to fix you

Today’s sucked so far, and in all possible ways. I will not go into details but I am pissed, and angry and I can actually feel all of the little bit of zen in my body seeping out of the pores. I am veering dangerously close to the brink, though I know once I cross over I will glide back into the zen mode only it won’t be the ‘the world is a happy place if you think about it’ zen, but the ‘the world is a fucked up place you can do nothing about’ zen. Either way, I am hoping the cross-over happens soon, because this middle ground is quite exasperating.

It is times like this when I feel that my cynicism towards those who say ‘there is no time as amazing as childhood’ subsides, and I see wisdom in their words. Ofcourse there is no time as amazing as your childhood. Yes, there was school and exams, but even if you were not the geek I was, those were the only worries you had. I mean think about, a life where every issue in the world could be sorted by doing one thing – studying. How simple was that? When in today’s life do you come across problems where the solution is spelt out as clearly as that? Forget the solution, once you are grown up, and have grown up responsibilities, looking for solutions becomes secondary, the toughest thing seems to be identifying the problem itself. Just how messed up is that?

And yes, there were fights in our childhood. If you reflect on those ‘fights’ you would be embarrassed to call them that. I mean, how’s it a fight if it is sorted within an hour just because the other guy came and said ‘friends’? So I hit you, pushed you, but I made the first move to fix it – that’s enough, and it works. Also, how easy was it defining a friend or an enemy? You hit me – enemy. You hit my friend – enemy. You shared your chocolates – friend. You gave me one more chocolate that you gave others – best friend. Wow. If grown-up relationships were a tenth as black and white as the relationships back then, there would be fewer heartbreaks.

The money you had to manage was the pocket money and there was some thrill in saving the rupee a day I used to get so I could buy something big at the end of the month – that bar of chocolate which I can pick every day now, but cannot have because, calories. What you got was directly related to the effort you put. You did not hear of the teacher who gave you 5 marks lesser than the other guy because he spent longer writing the exam. You did not have to start writing your to-do list in your head as you woke up because there was just one item on it – study, and the rest would be taken care of. It was as simple as that.

So yes, there is no time like childhood, there can’t be. The carefree life, the lack of grey areas, and the time you didn’t know what stress meant, or frustrations, when you weren’t always yearning for more; all that doesn’t return once it goes away. And like every other awesome thing, you only realize its awesomeness once it’s over. Perhaps you don’t give a thought on just how life would change in some years, because you don’t realize the extent to which it does. And even if the parents try to drill in the fact into your heads, you ignore it – because you are blissfully busy getting your knees scraped, while you play on the tar roads.

And that is the beauty of the whole thing.

11 thoughts on “Day 7 – And I will try, to fix you

  1. You are so right! I never saw it the way you said – all you have to do is study to solve all your problems! While growing up studying was such a burden for me, I hated it! And now sometimes (only sometimes) I feel like going back into academics to rid myself of all the stupid work-shit and instead immerse in some meaningful reading and reflecting. Ha, wishes!


  2. Life as a child was so much simpler that what we have as adults and more so as parents 😐
    I couldn’t agree more on how the only thing actually expected of us as a child was to study and how it was actually a great thing to do 😀
    Hope you feel happier and peaceful soon 🙂

  3. The Other Side of Life

    So true. 😦

    Also, when you were a child, you could actually be excited about taking a flight and going somewhere. When you are an adult and you do it every week once for work, its just not fun any more. Like I am doing right now.


  4. THIS – “You did not hear of the teacher who gave you 5 marks lesser than the other guy because he spent longer writing the exam.” That rings a bell 🙂 I hated studying.. And I wouldn’t get back to it for anything in the world. And yet, I found myself nodding in agreement at most of your post.

    I am reading your full blogathon today because man I have missed reading you!

  5. After you retire too.. Like whatsapp viral messages and FB posts and in conversations. Just say it long enough till everyone gets it. Damn, it has been 6 years since I commented regularly and both you and I sound grown up but some things have remained EXACTLY the same 😀

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